Relationship & Marriage Counselling
Couple Counselling Melbourne: In Clinic or Online
Reviewed for accuracy by Adam Szmerling on Accredited Mental Health Social Worker (AASW) and PACFA Registered Clinical Psychotherapist
Stuck in the same argument? Or drifting apart and unsure why? Our three couples therapists each work differently, so you can choose the fit and start to change the pattern.
- In Highett or online: 50-minute sessions.
- Evenings and Saturdays: times vary by therapist.
- $200 per couples session: see fees below.
On this page: Who to see · Check your relationship · How it works · Fees · Location · When we can’t help · FAQs
What is couple counselling?
Couple counselling is talk therapy where two partners work with a trained therapist to understand repeating conflict, rebuild trust and communicate more clearly. The relationship itself is the focus. Research suggests it can improve relationship satisfaction for many couples.
Which therapist is right for you as a couple?
Our therapists work in different ways. Choose the style that suits how you and your partner like to talk about problems.
Adam Szmerling
Psychoanalytic Psychotherapist
- $200 per 50-min couples session
Bernadette Cameron
Hypnotherapist, Counsellor, NLP Master Practitioner
- $200 per 50-min couples session
Humaira Ansari
Hypnotherapist, NLP Practitioner, Psychotherapist and Counsellor
- $200 per 50-min couples session
Compare our couples therapists at a glance
Swipe sideways to see every therapist →
| Adam Szmerling | Bernadette Cameron | Humaira Ansari | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Qualifications and memberships | Accredited Mental Health Social Worker (AASW). Clinical Psychotherapist (PACFA). Master of Social Work. Bachelor of Applied Social Science (Counselling). Training in Gottman Method Couples Therapy and Imago Relationship Therapy. | Certificate IV in Clinical Hypnotherapy. Resource Therapy Certification. NLP Master Practitioner. Member of the Australian Association of Clinical Hypnotherapy and Psychotherapy (AACHP) and the Neuro Linguistic Programming Association of Australia. | Certificate in Counselling. Certificate in Hypnotherapy and Psychotherapy. Diploma in Hypnotherapy. Diploma in Neuro-Linguistic Programming. Clinical Member, Australian Hypnotherapists Association. |
| Experience | 20+ years | 5+ years | 16 years |
| Main approaches | Lacanian psychoanalytic psychotherapy, Schema Therapy, Gottman Method, Imago Relationship Therapy, mindfulness | Client-centred counselling, Compassionate Inquiry, Resource (Parts) Therapy, mindfulness, clinical hypnotherapy, NLP | Trauma-informed counselling, hypnotherapy, NLP |
| In couples sessions | Explores the deeper patterns and early experiences behind repeating conflict | Builds calm, communication skills and emotional resilience | Works on repeating reactions and habits, blending talk therapy with hypnotherapy |
| May suit couples who | Want depth and are open to reflective, longer-term work | Feel that anxiety, stress or past hurts are fuelling conflict | Prefer online sessions and like practical tools alongside talk therapy |
| Format | In person and online | In person and online | Online only |
| Fee | $200 per 50 minutes | $200 per 50 minutes | $200 per 50 minutes (online) |
When is it time to try couple counselling?
How many of these sound familiar?
- The same argument on repeat: you both end up tired and nothing changes.
- Criticism or contempt: personal attacks (“you always…”), sarcasm or eye-rolling.
- Defensiveness or shutting down: one or both of you stop engaging, sometimes called stonewalling.
- Growing distance: you feel more like flatmates than partners.
- Broken trust: an affair, secrets or broken promises.
- Porn: one partner’s viewing has become a secret, a sore point or a source of distrust. Individual help is on our porn addiction therapy page.
- Big transitions: a new baby, a move, retirement or working from home together.
- Different needs around intimacy: our therapists also help with sexual concerns.
- Questions about the future: whether to keep working on the relationship or to separate.
Most couples argue. What tends to matter is how the argument unfolds and how often it returns.
These patterns are common. Seeing them in your relationship does not mean it is over.
Research that followed couples for 14 years found that the way partners handled conflict helped predict who later separated. The good news is that patterns can change.
Why do the same arguments keep happening?
In the early months, many of us idealise our partner and overlook their flaws.
Over time, small irritations can build. If they go unresolved, resentment and hurt may slowly wear down goodwill.
Eventually, both partners can become more invested in being right than in staying connected. Self-protection then takes priority over closeness.
At this point, it helps to move away from blaming, shaming and naming. A therapist can help you both slow down and understand what is really driving the argument.
Check your relationship in one minute
These four questions are the Couples Satisfaction Index (CSI-4), a short research measure of how satisfied you feel in your relationship. Answer on your own. If your partner answers too, compare notes afterwards. Your score is worked out on this page, and your answers aren’t saved or sent anywhere.
Question 1 of 4
- Please indicate the degree of happiness, all things considered, of your relationship.
- I have a warm and comfortable relationship with my partner.
- How rewarding is your relationship with your partner?
- In general, how satisfied are you with your relationship?
Your score
In the range linked with notable dissatisfaction. In the study behind these questions, scores below 13.5 out of 21 were linked with notable dissatisfaction in a relationship. A score can’t tell you why, or what happens next. If you’d like to talk it through together, you can book a couples session online or in Highett.
Connect nowAbove the cut-off. Your score is above 13.5, the point the study behind these questions linked with notable dissatisfaction. If one issue keeps coming up between you, it can still help to talk it through.
This check looks at satisfaction only. It doesn’t look at safety. If you feel afraid of your partner, call 1800RESPECT on 1800 737 732 or Safe Steps on 1800 015 188. In an emergency, call 000.
Questions from the Couples Satisfaction Index (Funk and Rogge, 2007). A screening score can’t predict whether a relationship will last.
How does couple counselling work?
- Get in touch: book online, call us or use our therapist finder. We can help you choose a match.
- Start with a first session: your therapist gets to know you both, what brought you in and what you would like to change.
- Build a rhythm: most clients start weekly, then move to fortnightly as things settle.
- Review as you go: we check progress with you and adjust the approach.
What couples often say in a first session
- “We have the same fight every week, and neither of us can remember how it started.”
- “We’re good as parents. As a couple, we’ve stopped talking.”
- “Something happened, and I can’t get past it, even though I want to.”
- “One of us wants to work on this. The other isn’t sure there’s anything left to work on.”
A composite of things couples often say to us, with details changed. It isn’t a quote from any one client.
How long does couple counselling take?
It depends on what you are working through. Some couples notice shifts within weeks.
With most of our therapists, couples work runs for around 6 to 20 sessions. Psychoanalytic work with Adam goes deeper and often runs longer. Pressure to change quickly tends to cause frustration.
No therapist can guarantee an outcome. Whether you rebuild or part respectfully, we support you to make informed decisions.
What does the research say about couple therapy?
Meta-analytic evidence supports couple therapy as an effective treatment for relationship distress on average. Individual couples respond differently.
Several approaches have a research base. John Gottman’s research highlights four conflict habits worth watching for: criticism, contempt, defensiveness and stonewalling.
Attachment theory suggests partners often reach for closeness or pull away in predictable ways under stress.
Our therapists explore these patterns in different ways, as the table above sets out. Some include mindfulness, which may help you stay steadier in heated moments.
Research is only one input. Your goals, your history and the fit with your therapist also shape how counselling unfolds.
Related reading
How much does couple counselling cost?
$200 per 50-minute couples session, in clinic or online.
- Medicare: rebates apply to individual treatment of a diagnosed mental disorder, so they are not available for couples sessions.
- Private health insurance: some funds may rebate relationship counselling. Cover depends on your fund and your therapist, so check with your insurer before you book.
- Bookings and cancellations: see our booking terms.
Where do we see couples?
- In clinic: 8/539 Highett Road, Highett VIC 3190, about 18km from the Melbourne CBD. We see couples from Highett, Brighton, Cheltenham and surrounding suburbs.
- Online: secure video sessions from anywhere you have privacy and a stable connection.
- Therapist hours: Monday 8:00am to 8:00pm, Tuesday to Friday 8:30am to 8:00pm, Saturday 8:00am to 6:00pm. Times vary by therapist.
- Reception: Monday to Friday, 8:30am to 5:30pm.
Our Highett clinic
8/539 Highett Road
Highett VIC 3190
Look for the Suite 8 door in the photo.
Who we cannot help, and where to go instead
We want you to reach the right service quickly. Some situations need services we are not set up to provide.
We do not take couples work involving:
- Family or domestic violence, current or recent.
- Coercive control, including intimidation, monitoring, threats or financial control.
- Child protection matters, including reports about a child’s safety.
- Family Law Court proceedings, current or likely, and other legal disputes. We do not provide mediation, family dispute resolution, court reports or expert evidence.
This is not a judgement about you. Couple counselling can be unsafe where one partner is afraid of the other, because open conversation can carry a cost afterwards. The services below are set up for exactly that.
Where to go instead
- Immediate danger: police, 000.
- Family violence, sexual assault or abuse, any gender, 24/7: 1800RESPECT, 1800 737 732, or text 0458 737 732.
- Family violence in Victoria, 24/7: Safe Steps, 1800 015 188.
- Worried about your own behaviour towards a partner: Men’s Referral Service, 1300 766 491.
- Worried about a child’s safety: Victorian Child Protection South Division intake, 1300 655 795. After hours, 13 12 78.
- Separation, parenting arrangements or family dispute resolution: Family Relationship Advice Line, 1800 050 321.
- Relationship counselling and mediation: Relationships Australia, 1300 364 277.
- LGBTIQA+ support and referral: Rainbow Door, 1800 729 367.
- Distress or thoughts of suicide, 24/7: Lifeline, 13 11 14.
Bayside Psychotherapy is not a crisis service. If you are not sure whether your situation fits, call us on (03) 9557 9113 and our reception team can point you in the right direction.
Couple counselling questions, answered
What happens in a typical couple counselling session?
Both partners share what is happening while your therapist listens for the patterns between you and guides the conversation. Together you explore communication habits and emotional triggers, aiming to ease anger, resentment and hurt.
Will we also have individual sessions?
Sometimes personal issues such as anger, addiction or unresolved trauma emerge. We may then suggest individual sessions. Your couples therapist does not usually become your individual therapist.
Will the therapist take sides?
No. Your therapist aims to stay neutral and support both partners equally, without blame, shame or criticism. If one of you finds it hard to speak, they make sure both voices are heard.
What if my partner is not ready to participate?
You can start on your own, with sessions focused on your goals. It helps to be open with your partner about attending.
How many sessions will we need?
With most of our therapists, couples work runs for around 6 to 20 sessions. Psychoanalytic work with Adam often runs longer. We review progress with you along the way.
Can we do couple counselling online?
Yes. Online sessions run by secure video, for the same 50 minutes and fee. You will need privacy and a stable connection. Ask your therapist whether online suits your situation.
Do you see LGBTQIA+ couples?
Yes. All relationship types are welcome, including married, de facto, LGBTQIA+ and polyamorous couples.
Can you help us if we are separating?
We can support couples working through whether to stay together or separate. We do not take matters already before the Family Law Court, and we do not provide mediation or court reports.
What if there is violence or controlling behaviour at home?
We do not take couples work in these situations. Please contact 1800RESPECT on 1800 737 732, or Safe Steps on 1800 015 188. In an emergency, call 000.
Start with one session
Book a 50-minute session in Highett or online. Your therapist will get to know you both and what you would like to change. $200 per session, with some evening and Saturday times.
Not sure who suits you both? Call reception on (03) 9557 9113, Monday to Friday, 8:30am to 5:30pm.
Note: This information is informative only and is not to be used for diagnosis or substitution of appropriate assessment and/or treatment by your GP or another qualified health professional. We take care to keep our information accurate and up to date, but it may contain errors or omissions. To the extent the law allows, we’re not responsible for loss caused by relying on it, as explained in our Website Disclaimer.
